You're the one whose heart aches with each post about Christmas.
Where walking through the store is a challenge.
Your life is messy, or scary, or confusing.
You feel alone.
It's hard now, at Christmas, isn't it?
When the world, and bloggers, seem to have beautifully packaged lives. Pictures and recipes and gifts and laughter and happiness.
Inside you feel sad.
Why doesn't anyone notice? Why does it have to be so hard?
Why now?
Why at Christmas?
Don't people know? Don't they know that it's hard to do Christmas when life is so hard?
Do they see?
I do.
I know.
I remember.
I remember walking through Target, with eyes brimming with tears, wishing someone knew that the only reason I was there was to try to find blackberries for the nausea for my husband that was caused by pain-meds from cancer surgery. I remember feeling sad and angry and bitter when I saw the carts bursting with goodies -- like I wasn't a part of the grand celebration.
I remember.
I relied on God greatly during that Christmas. God blessed me with a strength I didn't know I had. A strength to push that cart through Target and to say thank you to the cashier -- and not cry. At least not every time.
I remember thinking about all the hidden others, masked behind their lives, carrying loads. Burdens.
I remember.
Will you remember?
That perhaps that mom that is a bit shorter with her kids, or you, or the cashier, might just have a husband at home sick?
That there are many others who would love to fill a cart with food at Target?
That people, and friends, are way more important than things?
That there is a tomorrow. There is hope.
There is joy.
Even when life is hard?
I remember.
